Divine Decorum: Expert Advice on how to Avoid Celebration Chaos

Q: I feel like I have already spent a fortune on my wedding. Is it necessary to also get gifts for my bridesmaids?

-Sarah, Mount Prospect, IL

A: There is no wedding manual that says it is mandatory to buy gifts for your bridesmaids, but it really is the least you could do for all of the work that they have put into your special day (e.g. buying their dresses, planning your shower, etc.). It may seem daunting to provide presents for all of your leading ladies, but a “gift” does not directly translate to buying them all an Hermes scarf. Most of your bridesmaids would be just as appreciative if they received a handmade gift basket of natural spa products, or a photo album marking your journey from the beginning of your friendships. Bridesmaids gifts are meant to be a meaningful token of your appreciation, not a crater in your pocket: so you don’t need to make it one.

Q: I am graduating with my Bachelor’s degree and have plans to continue on to graduate school in the fall. I feel kind of awkward about having a party because I am not really finished with my education. Would it be tacky to host one?

-Matthew, Barrington, IL

A: Think back to your senior year of high school. You likely celebrated then, so what is so different now? Graduation parties are meant to be milestones of your education, not necessarily proof of final completion. The fact that you managed to get through four years of frat parties and finals (with presumptuously decent grades, since you are moving on to graduate school), is definitely worth celebrating. And furthermore, why deny the excuse to host a warm gathering with the important people you have met on your journey? Congratulations!

Q: My mother-in-law insists on hosting my rehearsal dinner at our local country club, but I would rather have it at the Botanical Gardens. Since she is paying, is it appropriate for me to input my opinions?

-Mindy, Lake Forest, IL

A: Unfortunately, the one that pays holds the power. Hosting your rehearsal dinner is not necessarily her obligation; it is more of a favor. If you want more of a creative input, consider paying for it yourself or having a bridesmaid host it (preferably one that shares a similar taste). Weddings can be the one of most memorable and stressful days of your life. In the end, just try and remember what all of the dieting, stress acne and insomnia are for: love.

To have your questions answered, email christina@christinacurrieevents.com